Perseverance in the Creative Journey
This series was inspired by a conversation with Elkin Antoniou G, a Producer and bookwriter of MARIAN the Musical. She shared an important truth about the creative process: the journey is messy, and it doesn’t always feel good. This might sound obvious, but accepting this reality is much harder when juxtaposed with the euphoria and obsession entrepreneurs have for their project, company, or product. We launch companies and embark on self-sacrificing, decade-long projects because we have a vision and passion for the most ideal outcome—and nothing less. Reality, on the other hand, is much more sobering.
In our conversation, Elkin shared what she expected the journey to feel like:
“I figured if I was working on theatre it would be fun and joyful and synergistic all the time because I love theatre so much…” She continues, “But that’s not what this is about. I don’t need to have all the feels. I don’t need to base my stability or anything on my feelings around it. It’s okay if it’s hard.”
“It’s okay if it’s hard.”
Those are powerful words—and getting to that point takes time. But what do you do when the creative process gets tough? What happens when frustration, doubt, or perfectionism take over? In this series, I’ll address an important dynamic: When your brain is anxious and on autopilot, it abuses and overuses your greatest strengths. This leads to 10 predictable, negative behaviors, or “saboteurs”: Judge, Avoider, Controller, Hyper-Achiever, Hyper-Rational, Hyper-Vigilant, Pleaser, Restless, Stickler, and Victim. The brain is doing far more sabotaging than you think! It happens subconsciously, making everything more difficult than it needs to be. Our saboteurs keep us from being at peace when things are difficult. That’s where Elkin arrived—the ability to have peace when things got hard.
With Positive Intelligence (PQ), we can lighten the load by addressing these mental barriers. In this series, I’ll explore three common saboteurs that frequently make hard things harder, and how to overcome them: the Hyper-Achiever, the Pleaser, and the Stickler. Let’s begin with my nemesis, the Hyper-Achiever.
Part 1: The Hyper-Achiever Saboteur – Breaking Free from the Pressure to Always Perform
What is the Hyper-Achiever Saboteur?
The Hyper-Achiever saboteur is defined as being “Dependent on constant performance and achievement for self-respect and self-validation.” 1 This saboteur distorts self-worth, making it conditional and dependent on the attention and acceptance of others. When things get hard or messy, the person with Hyper-Achiever believes that hardship is proof of not being good enough. For those like me who have a Hyper-Achiever saboteur, all beliefs get filtered through the lens of “not worthy” or “never good enough”. Like all saboteurs, this perspective is supported by a great, big lie: every achievement proves whether or not we are worthy.
Strengths of the Person With Hyper-Achiever
The strengths of people with Hyper-Achiever include the ability to inspire themselves and others towards meaningful growth, achievement, purpose, and full potential. They are driven, pragmatic, adaptable, goal-oriented, and self-directed.
How Hyper-Achiever Makes Things Harder
It is exhausting when every little task, conversation, or decision becomes a means of validating worth. There is no room for mistakes, no grace for being human, no slip-ups. Paired with the Stickler saboteur, it’s a powerfully destructive, anxious habit. Hyper-Achiever fosters even greater anxiety because the goal can never be reached. No act or action—positive or negative—can fulfill the worthiness trap, because its very premise is built on a lie. In this state, we have little capacity to handle challenges with peace. Working from Hyper-Achiever disables empathy, focus, curiosity, and creative thinking.
The Impact of the Hyper-Achiever on Creativity
Over-reliance on achievement stifles creativity. The Hyper-Achiever saboteur can’t enjoy the process or celebrate wins. Giving in to the process is extremely uncomfortable because of the desire to quickly arrive at “I’m okay” or “Let’s get this done.” This leads to burnout and a diminished capacity for innovation.
How to Overcome the Hyper-Achiever Saboteur: A Story
Hyper-Achiever was the way I ran my tech startup. Quite frankly, I’m surprised I didn’t wind up in the hospital. Every decision, every piece of writing, pitch, task to be done—of which there were hundreds—hinged on my worthiness, or lack thereof. That meant every meeting, every misunderstanding, and every missed opportunity was proof that I wasn’t worthy to launch, grow, or lead this company. It filled me with shame. Part of this was due to my Pleaser and Stickler saboteurs (more on those in upcoming articles) and being surrounded by people whose expectations were that I kept up this frenetic, unhealthy pace.
That’s another way our saboteurs make work harder—when we operate from them, people expect us to, and they reinforce our worst habits. One day, I’d had enough. I decided I wouldn’t continue that way anymore. It was eight years into the 10-year journey. Being a contemplative Christ-follower and yoga practitioner, I began thinking about “Sabbath rest” and silence. I decided that every time I became anxious, I’d close my office door, sit in silence, breathe, and pray until I felt better.
Little did I know I was training my brain to intercept anxiety. The more I put this into practice, the more I felt better. I experienced a dramatic shift in perspective. Neuroscience shows that when we focus attention on one of our five senses, the brain moves away from using the survival parts, like the limbic system, brainstem, and parts of the left brain. Focusing on our senses—being in our body, taking a walk, or practicing mindfulness—shifts the brain to the middle prefrontal cortex, empathy circuitry, and parts of the right brain. With practice, you can shift at will. That’s what Positive Intelligence Coaching is all about.
Turn Down the Volume of the Hyper-Achiever Saboteur:
Celebrate incremental wins and recognize progress, even if it’s small. Acknowledge the journey rather than just the end result.
Collect positive feedback from others and practice reflecting on it, rather than dismissing it as unearned.
Develop unconditional self-acceptance by giving it to others. Learn to separate your worth from your achievements through gratitude and vulnerability.
Actionable!
Take time today to write down three recent accomplishments, no matter how small, and reflect on the entirety of the experience, even the parts that were difficult, messy, or unpleasant. What was the gift and opportunity in the difficulty?
Curious about your own saboteurs? Take the Saboteur Assessment. It’s free!
Reference:
Chamine, Shirzad. Positive Intelligence: Why Only 20% of Teams and Individuals Achieve Their True Potential and How You Can Achieve Yours. Greenleaf Book Group Press, 2012.
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